Chopping post for Turkey Day ;-)

Yep! It’s 3:30 am…on THANKSGIVING and I am starting a blog post. Your guess is right…I am crazy! But I have some things on my heart today.

I am so THANKFUL this year. For both things money CAN buy and things money CAN’T buy. But the things that money can’t buy mean SO much more to me than anything.

There is a depth of my heart in which only 4 people have ever entered. And that is where they will stay, always. 3 are the obvious and the 4th one knows who they are.

Everyone knows that my boys (husband, #1, and #2) are my life. Words can not express the love I have for them.

I am thankful for them each and every minute.

Each time they smile.

Each time they laugh. Oh how I love to hear my babies laughs.

Their HEALTH!!!! So thankful that we are not spending Thanksgiving in a hospital. But a part of me feels a lil guilty because of the ones that have to. Oh how I wish they could be home with family.

Their sweet, sweet faces.

When they hug me ever so tightly. And when the big one tells me a million times a day how much he loves me. ME! They love me more than anyone in this entire world. I don’t guess this. I KNOW this because there is just a bond between my boys and me that can never be broken. Ever!

The. List. Just. Goes. On. And that’s not an understatement. All the words in the world can not explain how blessed I am to have my boys in my life. God chose me to be their mom and I am eternally grateful!!!

You can’t buy a mother/son love or the bond they share. Not with all the money in the world.

I keep wondering what in the world I did to deserve all of this…these amazing blessings!

My 20’s were hard. I’m not gonna lie. I spent the past 10 years learning ME. Growing into this person I am today. And guess what? I’m not finished growing. I list so many friendship within the past decade. But with each friendship fail, a lil lesson was gained. Lessons that would one day lead me to where I am now and preparing me for a much bigger plan in the future.

One thing that has been my constant in the past 10 years is my husband. He has never left my side. I loved him with all that I was when I married him 5 years ago. And I love him so much deeper, stronger, and with more passion than ever before. Cause you see, in the past 10 years, I went from a young teenager to a wife and mother of two who has to re-learn every day to be the person, wife, mother, and friend that I want to be. Is it expected of me? Yes! But I also WANT to be the mom that’s 3 boys deserve. I WANT to return the amazing love they have for me. I WANT to make them feel as special as they make me feel, day in and day out. And so I will strive every day to be a better person than I was yesterday. For them and for me.

So, I’m not going to say “people say…” But I will say that I’ve heard that people make their most lasting friendships while in college. I still don’t know if that’s true as I never went to a 4 yr college.
And I will also say that during what would have been my college years, I barely knew me. And I changed so much during that time.

But as the seasons in my life changed, the more people God put in my life. To help mold me, to teach me lessons, to be there for me, to look up to, to pray with…

And it wasn’t until this past year that everything started falling into place. I realized WHY certain things happened. God has a bigger plan for me that I couldn’t ever imagine.

And here I sit, telling you all how much all that heart ache, struggle, ups, and downs helped me. I realize now that God was testing me, He was using me, teaching me, and molding me. He did that because there is no way the 24 year old Jonie would be able to handle the current season I am in. I have learned how to be a friend, and WIFE. And it’s only by the grave of God that I keep learning how to become a better wife and friend than I was the day before.

I believe whole heartedly that the people (each and every one) who are in my life right now are here to stay. We all have this bond…the type of bond that can only be molded by Jesus Himself. ;-). He is what our friendships are based on.
And so, with that said, I will say that I. Am. So. Thankful. For. My. Past. Present. And future.

I don’t know what my future holds but I know the One who holds it.

This money CAN buy…or things that money bought.

We don’t have a lot of money. We are a single income family living paycheck to paycheck. But I will not sit here and gloat about the things that we worked hard for and was ultimately blessed with. I will not gloat about material things. But I will say that I am 100% THANKFUL for them. And there is nothing wrong with being thankful for material things.

Please understand that these things haven’t even scratched the surface of the list of things/people I am thankful for but it’s 3:30…not 4:30 am y’all! Lol!

Happy Thanksgiving, y’all!!!

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Life happens

So my baby is turning ONE.

You’ll probably see a couple of these posts so I apologize in advance. 😉

I am a lil sad and a lot excited!!! This is a big deal. God gave me not one, but TWO amazing bundles of joy. And they have been my conversation piece, my dress up dolls, my reasons to smile when I can’t seem to find a reason, my pride and joy, my sunshines on a rainy day, my cuddle bugs, my play-mates, my reasons to wake up each morning, my 2 lil EVERYTHINGS; oh and SO MUCH MORE. There aren’t enough words to describe what wonderful blessings my 2 boys are to me and everyone around them.

This birthday, my #2’s birthday is harder for me than #1’s 1st birthday was. Why you ask? Good question!

Is it because he’s my baby and he may be my last? And I’ll never get to experience a first year again? Or is it because he is already SO independent and he needs me less and less each day (not really but it sure seems that way. lol)? Or is it because I know what it’s like to miss your kid’s when they were babies and you don’t want this stage to end so soon?

YES!!! All of it!

But I know they must grow. It’s been so wonderful watch #2 grow and learn this past year. He is one amazing kid who has me smiling just by writing this. He is a stinker and a busy-body. He keeps me on my toes. And with him being so active and physically curious, I still have not once thought that I couldn’t handle more kids. He makes me want more. If all kids are makes my life as special as these 2 boys have made mine then I could have 10…no 5…no, 2! Just 2 more! 😉 but of course I can only have as many as my checking account allows.

Wow! What a rant! Have a fabulous Wednesday and Happy Thanksgiving if I don’t get to say in before. Speaking of…man! I can’t wait for DRESSING!!!!!

I said honesty and I didn’t let you down…

I know exactly what I need to do. I need to lose weight. Not just lose weight. I need to be healthy. I am SO tired of looking at all these fit moms and thinking “One day…” It’s sad, really. It’s so frustrating!!! I need to do it for ME, for my boys. I’m sure my husband wouldn’t mind either. I need to do it to have a healthy pregnancy (by the grace of God, in the near future). I have been overweight and pregnant and I do not recommend it. It’s all fine and glorious until you hit the 7th month. Then you are just praying that you’ll be able to sleep through the night.

Let’s be honest…you want to know WHY it’s so hard for me to lose weight?! It’s because I love food. Food is just too good. I am not using this as an excuse or justifying it. I’m telling you what goes on in my head every. single. day. Every time I get bored. Every time I get hungry.

I will say if again. It’s sad, really! But I KNOW how to eat healthy. I read up on it all the time. I know how to work out. I’ve done both and felt great and over all, loved it. So there is NO excuse! None!

I will be 30 in just 1 short month. I told my husband that I do NOT want to look like this on my birthday. Now, granted, I am not humongous. I mean, compared to a whale, I’m a toothpick. But I know I need to be thinner…healthier. But of course I told my husband the above statement and what do I do to fix it? Well, the same thing any person would do who wants to lose weight. I ate 3 cookies, a pack of gummies, and 2 large cups of coffee today. Of course I said that with every bit of sarcasm I could muster.

So I leave you with this…I will not promise that I’ll lose weight and look better in one month. But I can promise that I will pray each day for God to give me that extra umph that I need! Cause it’s important to me to be healthier for everyone I love!

When I can’t be there, I know One that is…

So I woke up in the middle of the night with a heavy heart. For the record, 5:30 am IS considered the “middle of the night” for me. Anything before 7 am is…

Anyway, my heart is scared for my oldest son for when he goes to real school and is forced to be around other kids. Did I prepare him well enough to be able to function around other kids?! He has been home with me every day for his whole life. With minimal interaction with other kids his age. Will he keep up with the other kids or will he expect Mommy to swoop in there and pick him up of he falls instead of getting back up on his feet to keep on a going. Will he be sad of other kids pick on him? How will he react to other kids picking on him? Will he make friends or will he sit at the lunch table lonely and alone? Will what he has to say interest other kids like it interests Mommy? Will they hang on his every word like Mommy does? Will they be considerate of his feelings like Mommy is? Will they force him into doing things he knows he shouldn’t?

The truth is, I. Just. Don’t. Know. I don’t know what the future holds. I can’t always be there to protect him all the time anymore. I have to let him grow and experience his own path. I will always be here to kiss his boo-boos and to give him kind words to sooth his broken heart. And to PRAY for him. But he will never learn in life if I don’t let him experience some things on his own. It’s hard. I want to always be there. I never want him to be sad or to have a broken heart. Or to be picked on. Or to pick on other people.

I want him to be a good influence. To be a leader, not a follower. Have a huge love for God that only grows bigger. I want him to lead people to Jesus. To be a blessing. To have great Christian friends whom I know will be there to comfort him and to build him up when I can’t be there.

But All of that starts with a simple prayer. I pray, in the name of Jesus, that my M will be surrounded with an abundance of Christian people in his life. People who will lift him up, will be there for him and he for them, will be great influences to him.

I don’t usually pray on paper- where others can read at least. And the above isn’t my whole prayer but is part of one that I’ve prayed time and time before. I pray that The Lord will place us in a church home that will help all of us grow as Christians. But of course, I know He will once we are out there looking. M

I love my boys more than anything. I would be right there by their side every second of their lives of I could. But I can’t. But I know One that will always be with them. Praise Jesus! Please help me pray this same prayer for my boys. Thank you in advance. I know this post is full of unfinished thoughts (I feel that way anyway). I just feel like I couldn’t stress my feelings enough. But thank you for reading and praying! Have a wonderful day.

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It’s Friday, y’all!!!

On Wednesday I had to Bible study with a couple of close friends and we studied on Proverbs 31. Now, we did Proverbs 31 earlier this year and I have to tell you that I can study that a million times and get something new out of it each time. I believe with each change in your life, and each season you enter, you will read Proverbs a lil differently each time. 

This time, I was reading through it and thinking “I have been working on this, this, and this for the past 6 months and the Lord has really blessed me…” Now, don’t get me wrong, I am not, by any means comparing myself to a Virtuous Woman. I’m not even on the same planet as a Virtuous Woman and to be honest, I don’t think she actually exists on this side of Heaven. And I’m not saying that to be mean. I just think that the descriptions in the scripture are just simply guidelines to try and follow. The Lord has given us His description of a Godly woman for all of us here on Earth to try and strive to be like. 

With that said, this last time I read the scripture of the Virtuous Woman, I opened my mind and my heart and tried to find something that I need to work on. And 2 verses actually spoke to me that night. 

One of them being Proverbs 31:26 NKJV She opens her mouth with wisdom, and on her tongue is the law of kindness.

 Proverbs 31:26 KJV She openeth her mouth with wisdom; and her tongue is the law of kindness.

And the other verse being…

Proverbs 31:15 NKJV She also rises while it is yet night, And provides for her household, and a portion for her maidservants.

Proverbs 31:15 KJV She riseth also while it is yet night, and giveth meat to her household, and a portion to her maidens.

Just in case you were wondering why on earth I am writing verses from 2 different Bibles, it is for my own benefit, honestly, since this is MY blog/diary. I will be honest and say that most times, I just don’t understand what is actually being said in the original KJV so I just cross reference with the NKJV. 

So anyway, the verse that speaks to me the most is 15. Basically saying that she rises eagerly and willingly to prepare her home for for family and such. And that is SO one thing I need to work on as a wife and mother. My family deserves it. And so I’ve been praying about it since Wednesday night and this morning, if I didn’t wake up at 5:40 for no reason at all and I went back to sleep. Woke up at 7:30 with every anticipation of going back to sleep once my husband left and instead, couldn’t at all. Hmmm…I think that was God trying to tell me something. I kept fighting it but eventually got on up and got my day started. 

After watching a few Vlog posts this morning, I decided on a whim to make my own Vlog. I have a deep personal desire to help other young moms since I, myself, struggled so much as a first time mom. Not financially but emotionally. I kept comparing myself to other “perfect” moms and I drove myself crazy trying to please everyone. And I know there are other moms out there facing the exact thing that I faced and at times, still face. I just want them to know they are not alone and that they are doing an awesome job. 

Please feel free to Pin or share my Vlog. Thanks in advance.

Happy Friday, y’all!!!

 

Thankful!!!!!

So I am not doing the 30 day thankful challenge on FB because let’s face it, if I had to rely on a birth control pill to keep me from getting pregnant, I’d surely get pregnant. I am just a forgetful (yet, thankful) person. But I want to take a few minutes to state what I’m thankful for. Be ware that some may seem rather silly. And none of these are in any particular order of importance. I write them as they come.

First thing, I am thankful for Siri in my iphone. Ha! She spells words that I don’t quite know how to spell. 😉

2ndly, This time last year, we were making the last minute preparations for my 10 month old’s baby shower and now, we are planning his first birthday. I am so thankful for him. This year has been one of the bests. My 1st born’s first year being the other best. I am head over hills in love with my boys!

3rd, I love nights that my man and I can lay down, cuddle and watch a movie. We stayed up til nearly 3 this morning but the quality time is so worth it. He is my best friend, my rock! I am very thankful for the nearly 10 years we have been together and 5 1/2 that we have been married.

4th, DVR. Very thankful to be able to record movies/shows to watch them later…like today, when I’m kid free. But I gotta tell ya, having my boys here is way more fun.

5th, I am thankful to have such photogenic boys. I just look at their pictures on the wall and I can’t help but to smile each time.

6th, new friendships!

7th, and unfailing God.

8th, the person I have become!

9th, a healthy family.

10th, a Mom who shows me daily, her unconditional love.

There are so many more things. But here are 10. And technically, I’m ahead as it is only day 6. 😉